“Made direct amends to such people, wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.” Step 9 Many people find this step… challenging. Fortunately, in CoDA, we have a method for making amends. It helped me to hear someone say at a meeting, “you don’t apologize to the Constitution, you amend it”.Continue reading “Step 9-Amends Are Changes Not Apologies”
I’m a double winner of sorts…recovering co-dependent and a recovering perfectionist.
Codependents often are other-focused. We often care too much about what others think about us. We believe the lie that our value comes from outside ourselves so it’s important to us that we appear perfect.
By John R. Three immediate and huge benefits for attending a Co-Dependents Anonymous Meeting: *Look it up. Don’t expect me to do your work.
It’s common for us to feel uncomfortable about our bodies, especially after the holiday season. We may judge them as not thin enough or attractive enough or strong enough or young enough or healthy enough. An important part of self-compassion is extending kindness and care to the physical form we inhabit, appreciating its gifts ratherContinue reading “Self-compassion toward our bodies by Dr Kristin Neff”
Once upon a time, I became obsessed with a narcissist. All I wanted was for him to commit to me and me alone. We had so much in common. I loved him and he loved him. This was my unconscious pattern. I’d done it before in my past relationships. I tried everything I could thinkContinue reading “hope for healthy relationships”
Parenting is hard. Being a codependent is challenging. Being a codependent parent is, well… something else. And even better, I find myself faced with the colliding specters of my own menopause and my daughter’s adolescence. The compulsive nature of my behaviors can be frustrating. For many years, I kept falling into a codependent parent trap.Continue reading “The codependent parent trap”
I was listening to an interview of meditation teacher and author, Sharon Salzberg this morning. She quoted a line from a movie which said, ‘love is not a feeling, love is an ability”. She went on to ask what if we thought about love primarily as an ability? Sharon explained…That means it’s not in theContinue reading “Love is an ability”
by Terrie C. I am a trauma survivor. I had difficulty feeling like I belonged in my family. I have struggled most of my life to feel like I belong. I feel fear in meetings because I choose not to identify myself as a codependent. And, I know, that to be true to myself, thatContinue reading “be true to yourself”
Helpful video discussing the victim/perpetrator/rescuer triangle so many of us often find ourselves in.
Studies have revealed that human connection can ease pain and reduce the symptoms of stress.