find answers

Path full of tree roots and rocks leading into the woods

What is codependence?

We found in each of our lives that codependence is a most deeply-rooted, compulsive behavior and that it is born out of our… dysfunctional family systems.

~CoDA Welcome

Codependence is a disease that affects our lives in many ways; our personal lives, work, health, and spiritual growth can all be impacted. If left untreated, it causes us to become more destructive to ourselves and others. Our behaviors and their roots can often be obstacles to maintaining healthy, nurturing relationships.

We have found these patterns of behavior fall into five major categories: denial, low self-esteem, compliance, control and avoidance.

Girl looking at her reflection in a lake of water

How do I know if I am co-dependent?

It all begins with an honest look at ourselves.

~Co-Dependents Anonymous Book

CoDA is a non-professional fellowship and offers no diagnostic criteria for codependence. We do provide a list of 55 patterns and characteristics which can help us to identify our codependent behaviors. We believe recovery begins with an honest self-diagnosis.

Answers to questions like the following can help us determine how we’ve looked to others to provide for our emotional well-being.

  • Do I control others to relieve my fears?
  • Do I let others control me for fear of their abuse or neglect?
  • Do I adapt or change my behavior for others?
  • Do I get my sense of worth as a person from others?
  • Do I avoid others in order to feel safe?

healthy relationships
recovery event

Is CoDA right for me?

The only requirement for membership is a desire for healthy and loving relationships.

~The Preamble

CoDA is a 12 Step Fellowship and peer support group. It aims to create a safe environment for those wishing recovery from dysfunctional relationships, providing anonymity and freedom from judgement or feedback. In CoDA we share our own experience, strength, and hope. We do not give advice.

Other 12 Step groups, like AA or Al-anon support people or friends of people, who have addictions such as alcohol. CoDA supports people to create healthy relationships starting with themselves, whether or not addictions exist in their lives.

The video below was produced by CoDA International. Feel free to share it with others via social media or email.

Find A Local Meeting

email questions to us at or through our Contact Us page.

in person meetings now open:

Mondays 6:00pm
Veteran’s Memorial Park Bandshell in Richfield is canceled due to cold weather.

Tuesday 6:30pm
Beautiful Savior Lutheran Church
5005 Northwest Blvd, Plymouth MN 55442
in the Resource Room, Enter the building through Door B

Tuesday 7pm
Prior Lake Alano
4646 Colorado St SE, Prior Lake MN 55372

Tuesdays 8pm
Elk River Alano Club,

9231 Odean Avenue NE, Otsego MN 55330

Saturdays 12pm
Suburban North Alano Club,

15486 Territorial Rd, Maple Grove, MN 55369

If you prefer an online meeting, find a list of local Zoom CoDA meetings by clicking the link below.

Recent Posts

Practical Tips for Reducing Tension When You’re ‘Safer At Home’

by Emma Grace Brown If someone had told you in January that you would spend your entire spring and summer breaks at home, you probably would have laughed. After all, warm weather was supposed to wash away the woes of winter and give us a chance to see friends and family near and far. And … Continue reading Practical Tips for Reducing Tension When You’re ‘Safer At Home’

More Posts